THEME

yaoidiot:

people who shower in under 5 minutes

  • ..
  • ..?
  • .?…??
  • how
My BFF Coming out to her 89 Year old Grandmother
BFF: Grandmother I need to talk to you
Grandma: [concerned voice] What? What is it? Are you sick?
BFF: No, no. Grandma. I'm gay.
Grandma: What?
BFF: I'm gay Grandma. I have a girlfriend now.
Grandma: [relieved voice] Oh honey, is that all? I thought you had cancer. Anytime someone needs to tell me something they are sick. Who's your girlfriend, when is her birthday? I'll bake her a pie.

lonelygiraffe17:

Trusting people is becoming hard

Keeping my grades up is becoming hard

Feeling pretty is becoming hard

Thinking happy thoughts is becoming hard

Doing work is becoming hard

Maintaining a friendship is becoming hard

Doing everything is becoming hard and I don’t like it

johnocallahgans:

does anyone else regret not attending concerts that happened before you were even a fan of the band because I do and it hurts

sleepygirl586:

dippity-do-not-touch-me:

once my sister got rejected for a job at a web design company that she really wanted to work for so that night she hacked into their website and redirected it to her blog and the next day the CEO called her and hired her on the spot so moral of the story: if at first you don’t succeed, hack their website and make them beg for mercy 

THIS IS SO BRILLIANT

Nice things to whisper when hugging someone

yogurtville:

-you smell different when you’re awake
-please help me (then smile as if nothing happened)
-soon
-you have lovely skin, I can’t wait to wear it
-your hair tastes like strawberries
-tonight….you.
-he knows, don’t go home.
-I always knew you would die in my arms
-every time I poop I think of you
-no one will ever believe you
-yessssssssssssss
-I killed mufasa
-I bet you didn’t feel me lick your ear
-mother told me it would be like this

"A woman should be… whatever the fuck she wants."
- (via fuckinq)

garrythechap:

hetastein:

special-snowflake-hall-of-fame:

beyoncevevo:

perfectgay:

what has four letters and is very hard

rock

math

life

Dick

diddily:

when your mom tells you to do the dishes

image

thesassycat:

sitting next to your crush like

image